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How to lose suscribers
|date=Post-2016 |subject=Real life |proceeded by=''How to gain suscribers (100K-suscriber special!)'' |succeeded by=Incumbent }} How to lose suscribers is the thirteenth known video uploaded to YouTube by Summer Petersen, with the username SummerTheStarGeek at some point after 2016. The video features her childhood friend, Josh Hogan, as a quiet yet spunky guest star. It is fourteen minutes long. Transcript and caption This is the transcript of the video, or at least what is known: SUMMER: Hey, guys! This is my brilliant guest star and I'm honored to have him. JOSH: No, I should be the honored one. How many suscribers do I have, like, forty? My name is Josh Hogan, she's been my homie for five years, so...yeah. SUMMER: There are so many ways to gain suscribers, and I uploaded a video about just that where my other best friend was a guest star! But this doesn't cover any of that. In fact, this is the one and only video that does the opposite. JOSH: That's right. You want people off your back? Is fame too much for you? Do you want to be low-key without having to give up your account and everything in it? Look no further! SUMMER: So without further ado, this is how to get rid of followers. And trust me, this dude knows a lot of good tactics. JOSH: For one thing, you have to be inconsistent. SUMMER: Couldn't agree more. Uh, could we have an example please? JOSH: I'm nervous. SUMMER: And quiet too. Hey, I totally understand homie. One amazing example is posting in as many places as you can, 'Since, say, two-nine-twenty sixteen I have promised to upload a video everyday at eleven', and barely upload anything, and when you do, it's nothing like the videos that people come here for because they could get rubbish like this anywhere else. JOSH: You have to be childish too. But you know what's essential? Cussing! SUMMER: Oh, yes! And speaking of crossed lines, not only are Mormons sensitive to swear words, but children are too. JOSH: And like it or not, they're an essential part of the planet, perhaps most of all. SUMMER: What's wrong with that? Believe it or not, most comments on YouTube are from Only motherf*****s think they can have it both ways. Kids, toddlers, babies, they're a blessing. JOSH: Bulls***! To think I used to be young! They have annoying high-pitched voices and overreact to everything! Kids are a f***ing plague! SUMMER: See? Now everyone's feeling tempted to leave and never come back. (children fleeing in a black-and-white flashback) Come on, Josh! You just scared all the kids away! Well, s***. Thanks a damn lot, Josh. Hopefully they'll come back since most of my videos are some pretty family-friendly s***. JOSH: Family-friendly my a**! How about the one where you're showing off how sexy you are and telling people that if they used to be dicks they can go f*** themselves if they have a change of heart? SUMMER: Most, I said. Wait. You think I'm sexy? JOSH: Even in a paper bag, where ironically someone could see the outline of your distended beauty, you should know this. Dirty-minded s***heads should also be aware you can find someone attractive without being attracted to them. SUMMER: No f***ing kidding. You know I love you Josh, but not in the way I love Steven. No thug or c*** or c*m-licking mother******s can stand between us and our love. (rubs her forehead) God, cussing gets me so wet. JOSH: Oh, I get it, now that the kids are gone, can we sing the "NC-17 Song?" SUMMER: Why the hell not? (sings the song together) ... SUMMER: Don't be a raisin, just be a grape! JOSH: 'Cuz raisins taste weird and grapes are always a welcome treat! Unless the raisins are golden, obviously. Bye y'all! Appearances * Notes and references Category:YouTube videos